Falling in love is such a fickle thing.
Sometimes it’s immediate. A visceral reaction that takes control of emotions, senses and your entire world. Other times it can take ages and surprise you when it turns out that love has been in front of you the whole time in the form of a best friend. And of course other times it’s just pure dumb luck.
But how does one fall out of love when you don’t want to? Feelings change and that’s reasonable. But when one person holds onto love it becomes a painful experience. Ask A Man Too has made it clear that we don’t speak for women, we’ve made it clear we don’t understand women and we’ve made it clear that we love and respect women.
Today Ask A Man Too felt the loss of someone leave to be in the arms of another person and hopefully marry that person. We had accepted that this was coming. We had told the person that while we loved her, we were in fact the wrong man for her. And their it is, the answer to letting go – accepting that you are not the right person for the one you love. Putting their hopes and dreams before your own is honorable and the decent thing for someone to do. Is it true though?
Even when the answer is yes, the pain of loss is still palpable. And wanting that other person to be happy without you is the right way to feel no matter how long it takes your heart to agree.
Say the words. Be honest. Let go and you might keep a friendship that ultimately stands the test of time. Don’t let go and you are destined to live a lie and be miserable. Misery is for suckers.
While we believe that men are idiots when it comes to women, letting go of your emotional dream (remember that the other person has long since moved on) is the right thing to do. Letting go with a bit of style and a lot of grace is what we did. It’s what we recommend any man who cared for anyone do.
In our case our heart was rediscovered and while it may still pine after what might have been, we learned that we still have a heart to share and for that we will always be thankful and we will always love this other person, but putting their happiness first was and is the right thing to have done.
Let go and be happy.